Sike!

So today is Tuesday and I have almost been stopped smoking 2 days now *snigger* ha! No, not really! I should've been born with feathers for I did not quit on Monday. Uh ut. I couldn't find my AC book and I wanted to read up some before stopping my bad habit but I only found it yesterday so I kinda figure that's as good an excuse as any to not stop on the day I said I would. So shoot me.
I AM stopping. But I have to feel partly ready so I have been having some great conversations with myself with regard to my smoking habit. They were awesome. I highly recommend it (talking with yourself).
 On a bum note, missed college today. First day back too! Wtf. Too personal to explain why on here so sod off. Oh, and I want to know who hid my MOT test certificate. It only went missing 'cos I really needed it today. However, if I didn't need it, it would have been glaring me in the face but no, the little fker went missing. Now I have to WALK to the PO tomorrow to get my tax 'cos I couldn't find it before PO closed. Oh, but hang on, I can't. No MOT cert! You can't even begin to imagine the hassle this has caused me for tomorrow. Sods law showing it's ass again. Well it can take it's stinky ass and fack off! Guess I'm going the online route...yeah, that's like a red rag to a bull 'cos ya just KNOW my internet is gonna cut out now! Ah well, can't win 'em all can ya?

Blood? What blood?!

So today I was supposed to 'do my bit' and give blood. True to form, something happened to mess that up but if the powers that be think I'm going to overlook this and forget all about 'doing my bit' then it's fighting a losing battle. So stick that where the sun don't shine!
Have spent a lot of today trying to not think about tomorrow. Aye, its 'don't do that it's bad for you' day. Yip, losing my one 'n only vice :( No more ciggies for me. My mindset is not where I wanted it to be but again, I'm rubbish and didn't read up any. Now whether this is an excuse or not I don't know, but I'm gonna have a word with my kids about my lil 'promise'. The one I made to stop smoking Monday 30th. I'm thinking maybe I ought to get a couple of days reading done (Allen Carr) so that come my stop date, my head will at least look like its curving towards getting round the FACT that I will no longer be accommodating nicotine in my life. Hmmm. Excuse? Or sensible? Obviously, I'm going to choose the latter :) Will see...

Tired...

...thanks to my lil nephew. Babies, I have decided, are not conducive to a good night's sleep! How a 6 month old baby can survive on such little sleep is beyond me, I thought that was what babies were all about :/ I. Need. Sleep.
Another day nearer to stopping the dreaded weed arghh! Gawd, why am I still seeing it as a negative to quit a negative habit?! Need my books asap!
God my eyes are like lead, and I've got another night of this lol boy what have I let myself in for...

Slow down...

So, it's another day nearer to my quit date. Bring it! Err, actually no don't bring it just yet, I need time to adjust! Must must must dig out all my books - Allan Carr is my hero! I tried quitting a few days ago and lasted all of 36 hrs woo! I was using NRT and although it took the edge off (I was using patches and spray) it hit me that I wasn't actually conquering my addiction. Whilst some people don't mind using such products, I realised I didn't really wanna long out the withdrawal process so I'm gonna be doing this quit CT. My mind is telling me I may as well carry on smoking if I'm gonna be using NRT cos I'm still not addressing my addiction by using it so I'm just gonna soddin' go for it and hope for the best! Btw, to anyone reading this that are using NRT, good for you and good luck with it. Whatever works for ya. At least you're not inhaling all the other nasty crap that come with smoking cigs to get the nicotine. We all share the same end goal and may all of us reach it.
Anyhoo, time to get some study done. My college tutor is going to be sooooo impressed with my assessment I'm working on. Never before has she had to spend so much time correcting all my mistakes in her feedback lol Well! Fancy giving me all that work and expecting ME to know where everything goes!

The day before the weekend before quitting

So it's Thurs night with nothin' to do. Surprise! Hell, let me rewind a decade or two where I was never in, always out. Knockin' back the drinks like there was no tomorrow...those were the days!
I am planning to quit that horrible nasty habit of smoking Monday 30th Jan. Go me! Dunno if I will succeed, just trying not to create pressure by telling myself that I won't ever smoke again. I mean, damn, thats like being told I'll never get to pick at cheese strings again! I love cheese strings damnit. However, I do appreciate the differences between a cheese string and a cigarette lol
On a plus note, I got myself a job - community support worker - so that will keep me busy once I start. I also plan to re-start volunteering at a hospice not too far from me so that also will make far better use of my time than dragging poisonous fumes in to my body!
Three days till I stop....